It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
