Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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