Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize