I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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