i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
