my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
