I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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