u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
