I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize