Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
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