As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
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