and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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