She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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