And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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