love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
