Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Randomize
