So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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