i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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