its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Boobs are out for the taking
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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