her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize