my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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