I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
