I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
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