I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize