My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize