i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize