well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.