I must be too annoying 4 u.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter