Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize