i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize