she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
they need to just BURY HIM!
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
