chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
