what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Pooping to opera.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
