Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I party with great urgency now.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize