Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
