Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Blow job season was short but glorious.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
