Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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