Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
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Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
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Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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