I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
