Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
