Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
