Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived