Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
