You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
