I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize