come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
