Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
This toilet bowl is my home.
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