ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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