Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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