Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize