Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
